Remember that client I said sucked my will to answer the phone? The one that was calling every day, sometimes two, three times a day? Guess who called this morning? If you said Barney the Purple Dinosaur...what the hell is wrong with you? If you said "That Client"...ding ding ding! You win...Nothing! The receptionist buzzes me and tells me who is on my line. I sigh, and say "Ok." I suck it up and answer the phone.
"Hello, Mr. Client. How are you?" I'm prepared for another stress-laden rant about the process of bankruptcy, dealing with the trustee, and evil banks from hell.
"All of our accounts were unfrozen this morning." The relief in his voice is palpable. I actually FEEL it through the phone. I also feel my stress and anxiety leeching away.
"That is wonderful. I'm glad! I'm so sorry you guys had to go through this."
"We also called the car finance company and worked out the missed payment, and made it this morning."
I reminded him not to deposit his next paycheck into that account, but instead to take it to a local bank or credit union and open an account with a branch where we know who the bankers are and it's not some faceless conglomerate.I suddenly feel like a 1,200 pound gorilla has been lifted off my back. Yeah, you've heard the phrase "Monkey on my back." A monkey is a slight annoyance. This issue had been weighing me down to the point where I couldn't sleep, I was cramping at night from muscle tension, and I when I did sleep, I tossed and turned from the stress and anxiety. This was definitely no monkey - this was a gorilla. I breathed deeply and calmly for the first time in a week.
I continued work on my end of month billing, I did some more client work, and generally had a relaxed day without feeling like I was on the verge of tears...or throwing myself from my boss's balcony.
Now, there's this administrative assistant who works for OWD and who does a lot of different things, including mail-room duties. She's awesome. But she's quiet. I don't hear her until she's right on top of me. So when she called my name I jumped. She set down an Overnite-Express package and said "This just came for you today." I looked at the package warily.
I sat there, facing off with this package. My thought pattern was something along the lines of "
I don't think I want to know what's in that..." I got brave, however, and opened up the first envelope...
KERTHUNK...a huge bundle of papers, held together with massive rubberbands lands on the desk. I open the other envelope, and an equally massive stack of papers lands on the desk next to the first. I grab the paper off the top and it hits me. We're back to nightmare land. Remember a few posts back where I talked about D-Day? Then it was us, scrambling to provide discovery. Today...the tables have turned. But I'm not too thrilled about this.
This is Production of Documents by JPMorganChase ("JPMC") and Bank of America ("BofA"). This is also called "Document Dumping." I have just received
1240 PAGES of documents from the defendants, JPMC and BofA. Not only are there over 1,200 pages, much of it is documents with very tiny financial language - you know, the fine print no one ever reads but then it causes your credit card interest rate to skyrocket from 4.99% to 23.99% APR. I just sit there and have to laugh. This is what happens when big corporations with lots of money and lots of lawyers are sued by a single practicing attorney with one or two staff members. They dump documents on you at the last minute and show you that they can churn out paper faster than you can ask for it.
I wander into my attorney's office and let him know what I just received. He asks me if there is a verification. I look at him and say "Where might that BE in this stack?" He says it should be at the end. I look...no verification. I flip through all the other pages, thinking it may be in the middle of the mess. No verification. I relay this information to the attorney, who looks pensive. Then he says, "Then, technically, they did not produce any documents."
I just shake my head. Litigation is an interesting...and sometimes childish....game.